Tall Girls Have All the Luck

The other day I was watching a TV show that was showing old TV commercials. Most I didn't think much of, but one in particular brought back some memories. This commercial was the epitome of what I wanted to be when I grew up; it gave me hope that one day I could be a something, a someone, a somebody. This commercial inspired me and gave me hope. Was this a commercial for world peace? No. How about ending poverty? No. This was a commercial that changed my life; this was a commercial for Nair Leg Hair Removal.

In the commercial, the women would put Nair on their legs, it looks like shaving cream, and poof! the end result was long, tan, beautiful legs, with no hair, of course. It taught me that a woman could wear short-shorts after using the Nair and the men would love her. I swear, as a kid, I thought that when I got older, I would buy some of that Nair and I would put it on my legs and I would be Ms. Thing. Uh-huh. Snap snap.

My friends and I would sing the little song from the commercial, probably more than was a healthy amount. If you don't know the song or need a refresher, here it is (Who wears short-shorts? We wear short-shorts. If you dare go bare it's Nair with alovera), or something very close to that. The commercial had a bunch of women sitting at what looked like an ice cream counter in super short-shorts with very long, tan legs, and it was all due to the Nair, or so I thought. I just knew I would be one of those girls one day.

Fast forward about so many years and well, things just didn't turn out quite like I figured. First off, I am only 5'2" and I think those models' legs alone were 5'2, so right there I was out of the running to be a Nair leg model girl. I also hate the heat and am not a big fan of tanning, so again, there goes the tan part being that I am either white or pinkish or a dark red from a sunburn. As for beautiful legs, mine aren't too bad, but nothing like the ones those women had. Plus, at my age, it might be a felony if I were to wear the short-shorts out in public and I really don't want to be locked up.

It is funny how, as a kid, I really thought that that Nair would give me long, tan, beautiful legs. As an adult, I know better. Sometimes it would be nice to not figure things out and still have those silly dreams. Speaking of dreams, please do not even get me started on the Rockettes. I am speaking of the world famous New York Rockettes, the ones in the showgirl type outfits that perform the famous kick line. I thought they were perfect and really wanted to be one, maybe as a side job to being a Nair leg model. My dreams were crushed when I found out the Rockettes have a minimum height requirement of 5'6". I can't even tell you how much I wanted to be one of those ladies.

I have since gotten over my dream of being the Nair leg model/Rockette and maybe I should work on world peace or ending hunger, as those would be much more realistic dreams for me. Boy, those tall girls have all the luck; sometimes life just isn't fair.
(c)2007 Cindy Breninger All Rights Reserved.